And some days I think I’d feel better if I tried harder.
Most days I know it’s not true.
–The Mountain Goats

Nothing has turned out as we expected. It never does. Life’s under no obligation to give us what we expect. We take what we get and are thankful it’s no worse than it is.
–Margaret Mitchell

Dark times have befallen POGdom and the DC Universe. This blog has fallen victim to apathy and absentmindedness. Our homemade DVD has collected dust due to a stretch of over six months without a single Christmas. Superman’s new costume has knee pads.

I want to take a moment to emphasize that this blog a purely fan-driven endeavor, and is in no way affiliated with anyone involved in the production of the Videos. In fact, we’ve recently received an official stamp of disapproval from a prominent member of the cast.

But that won’t dampen our enthusiasm! It can’t! We are POG. We are used to disappointment. Anguish is an old friend of ours. Not like a close friend though… one we hate. I guess it’s an enemy. But we share a bathroom. That’s a metaphor.

What I’m trying to say is that if we could be deterred by absolute hopelessness, we would never have gotten started in the first place. Aspiration to POGhood precludes success! This website was started as an exercise in futility, to spit in the face of God and celebrate a poorly (re/con)ceived promotional video series from the 90s rather than do something worthwhile or interesting with the “gift” of life.

What does POG mean? I think you have your answer right there.

Oh, and I started a Wikia wiki for general information about the POG Trilogy, because it’s annoying to update these pages that aren’t meant for that kind of thing. I’m moving all the info from these pages to those. This blog will be a blog, with articles and editorials, and the other stuff will be a wiki. Feel free to contribute! I might, if I feel like it.

In minor news, Curt Visca (Herbie) managed to convince the Capistrano Unified School District to allow Ambuehl Elementary to continue their “Popcorn Friday” program, which nets the local PTA $150/week! Go Herbie!

But it’s not all roses and glasses in POGtown. It is with a heavy heart that I relay to you that beloved POG co-writer/director/Man Giving Directions Boix Nathanson has passed away. I don’t know how or when, only that he’s left us. I’ll pass on any news when and if I hear it. In the meantime, our thoughts and prayers go out to his family, if he has any. Whatever form POG3 takes, it won’t be what it could have been.

Well. That looks… different. It’s going direct-to-DVD, which isn’t surprising. Doesn’t look like there’s going to be a VHS version. Here’s the synopsis from Lionsgate (via bloody-disgusting.com):

When a 2000-year old mummified murder victim – a Pog Body – is inadvertently disturbed, he rises from the dead. Mummified for retribution and trapped for eternity, his body is unable to decay and his soul is unable to reach heaven or hell. As this Pog Body returns to life, he wreaks havoc on a local group of strangers who unwittingly share a guilty secret. Alone in the dark, they are met with misfortune as this mysterious victim seeks vengeance on their dark past.

Looks like they’re doing an “Evil Dead 2″ sequel/remake thing. The “Pog Body” is obviously Burp, except now he’s traveled to the future as a mummy rather than via the (admittedly cheesy) time portal of the original. It seems they’ve played pretty loose with the rest of the characters (they went too young with Eddy, IMO, and did they combine the Smedleys?!?), but I’ll try to withhold judgment until I’ve seen more. Gotta say I’m pretty happy with Vinnie Jones as Herbie, though. Wouldn’t have thought of it in a million years, but it works!

L: Vinnie R: Herbie... or is it the other way around?

The trailer is embedded below. Check out 1:06 for a scene that I think will make Tor/Smedley ‘shippers pretty happy! (BTW, the “original” title you’ll see in the trailer was “Pog Bodies” (ech!) but they thankfully came to their senses and came back to the (almost) original “Legend of the POG”.)

Anyway, June 9th, 2009—mark your calendars! The comments are open—what do you think?

Pineapple Orange Guava juice (for illustrative purposes only)

A: POG stands for Passion Orange Guava, the three fruits that make up the drink called POG.

Notice that there is no Pineapple in POG. That’s how you can tell that this juice is an impostor.

ALSO: I found a a fellow “poggerino” Searching for POG in the San Francisco Bay Area in 2007. If anyone has a time machine and knows where to find POG juice for sale, please help him/her out.

• Added mini-bios for Herbie J. Winkleman, The Smedleys, Eddy Tor, and The Wise Men to the Characters page.
• Added two photomosaic wallpapers (one for HERBIEheads and one for voTORies) to the Misc page. These are composite pictures constructed purely from screencaps from The Videos! I made them using AndreaMosaic, and you can make your own!
• Added The Mystery of the Strong Herbie to The Mysteries. It’s poorly written, but it has pictures.

Also: with the holiday season already upon us, I’d like to use this opportunity to point out that the Searching for POG and The Legend of POG make great gifts, assuming that you can find copies and that the person you’re giving them to will like them.

Yes, we all know what POG stands for, but what does it mean?

Answering that question is the primary purpose of this site. We endeavor to catalog various ideas and messages contained within the greatest promotional video series of our time: The POG Trilogy. By reading between the lines (or should I say “between the cartons?”) of the videos Searching for POG and The Legend of POG, perhaps we can discover the message behind the story. Admittedly, this is an undertaking of significant difficulty, and so far we have discovered very little of interest. As the Wise Old Man says, “I see everything, and I see nothing.”

But we are just beginning! And we could use your help. Every page on this site (including this one!) should have comments enabled. Please share your theories, even if you’re stupid or you don’t know what we’re talking about. I’ll incorporate the more insightful comments in the main text of the site! We hope to create ultimate POG Trilogy fan site! The definitive resource for the dedicated POGhead (Winklefan?).

If this is your first time here, you might be confused by the somewhat unconventional layout of the site. Relax! It’s not actually all that complicated, once you get used to it. This front page will list updates (also available through RSS feed linked just under the banner!), while the tabs at the top allow you to quickly jump to the main areas of interest. I suggest you start with “The Videos” to get a good overview of the series. From there, it’s up to you! Just remember rule #1: Have Fun!

NOTE: POG™ is a trademark of The World POG Federation and is used without permission.

Currently you’ll find a synopsis for each Video, a few Character bios, rudimentary FAQ and Trivia sections, plus some desktop wallpapers I made (filed under “Misc“) to add some much needed Winkleman to your daily computer activities. And of course, please feel free to comment if you find any errors or have something to contribute. The Meaning of POG is always on the lookout for some “new, bright, handsome and perfect” ideas. As Eddy Tor always says, let’s “get to the bottom of this!”

The ultimate POG Trilogy fansite!

NOTE: POG is a trademark of the World POG Federation and is used without permission.